As tolerance grows, increasing amounts of alcohol are needed to reach the same
state of high, of emotional numbing and phycological distance from self. Over
time the brain adapts to cope with the alcohol’s continuous release of artificial
stimuli and chemical hijacking. New pathways attempt to restore balance
inadvertently changing the way a person thinks, distorting personal values and
boundaries, in affect altering the way a person chooses and makes decisions.
Alcohol doesn’t make things more interesting; it
makes your mind stupid so that things that would
otherwise have bored it are suddenly enough to
A new driven focus, subconscious and subtle to the drinker is now fixated towards
alcohol, priorities become irrational and biased in favour of drinking. Caught in the
addictive cycle of consistently needing a drink; to feel more confident, calm an
anger or hurt, harbour a resentment or frustration. To pacify the anxious unsettled
mind or body, a symptom of withdrawal, initially triggered by an emotion, a
dysfunctional thought, to physical and mental cravings and pouring the next drink.
Examine what you tolerate. The biggest stress is being
who you are not.
Drinking patterns downplay the autonomy, and true potential of an individual;
with their original and unique moral benchmark becomes distorted and depressed.
Along with the familiar ripple effect of relationship, social and financial loss. Even
those who claim they could stop, they “don’t need a drink they just enjoy it” could
if they were honest name situations where drink ‘got in the way’; caused them to
be ‘less available’ for their family, a friendship, a lover, when drink dealt the trump
card and won over their true relational wishes and needs.
In reality it is not alcohol that is addictive, but
the addictive need to change the way you feel.
Brain processes work against you in the chemical hook to want more and more.
The hard wiring is overrun by a complex alteration and decrease of brain function,
in some cases destroying brain regions which are meant to help us survive. When I
finally decided to get sober, it was a revelation to me, why everyone did not
experience this driven motivation for more. I naively assumed at the time, because
others lacked stamina, or a sense of carefree fun always needing to be in control.
It didn’t occur to me they were fundamentally fulfilled, forward focused and
possessed a healthy sense of self-esteem. An anomaly to think in a self-promoting
style, able to make healthy choices for myself; instead, I was filling the void, which I
believed at the time, was answered only by alcohol.
It is not drinking that’s the problem. But the
thinking behind the drinking.
Drinking damages, the connecting receptors which communicate between different
regions of the brain. Specifically, the memory and learning systems; negatively
influenced by the initial euphoria and over time the personal reward of drinking.
Experience accumulates, forming associations towards ‘coping’ and ‘drinking’. Both in
the individual’s mind and internal world, but also from their context and environmental
cues and triggers, creating a cycle of habits. The equivalent of a healthy brain
responding as it should to a foreign substance, which is both false and hostile.
Alcohol’s chemicals stimulate and mock the meaning of connection, a temporary
warmth and satisfaction like no other to the drinker. As time passes the bond grows
to be a reliable anxiety reliever, dependable emotional rest bite, feigning a friend who
will always stand in, creating a coexistence and a new hierarchy of needs of survival.
Living in the addictive cycle feels as much an entrapment as it does self-soothing.
Equally your world becomes smaller as alcohol robs you of your authentic confidence
and self-esteem, living on your nerves, emotionally unpredictable, unsure of what
normal feels like anymore. Subconsciously deluded by your own behaviour, refusing to
believe alcohol has caused you more vulnerability than before it took its hold
.......because you are too afraid to imagine a life without it.